November 24 - Weekly Forecast

Unless patterns change, we're in for a powerful storm of misremembering.

Our weatherman expects the misremembering to peak on Thursday, when Americans gather at their tables, first to misremember the Puritans, and then to misremember all manner of anecdotes, jokes, childhood occurrences, highlights of the past year, and recent oaths concerning portion size.

But this doesn't mean the storm will arrive all at once, or dissipate quickly. Measurements of misremembering are already at elevated levels. Take, for example, the new survey of people's beliefs about Vikings, which were then compared against the historical record, and, in conclusion, the researchers veritably begged young men to learn the minimum about Vikings, before setting sail as Vikings.

You'll have seen more examples, if you've read three headlines this morning.

So, carry an umbrella, and a bag of granulated salt, and if you feel a yen to remember the Maine, the Alamo, the first Thanksgiving, or whoever it was that won Love Island in season three, a precautionary trip to the library (while it's open) can help protect your friends and loved ones.