October 6 - Ostrich Forecast
Noodles, tacos, and Octobers other minor holidays.
If you missed last week's forecast, there's still time to name your car (an act officially called-for on October 2nd). Statistics from the NHTSA indicate that more than 68% of Americans are regularly driving nameless cars, a dangerous situation that must be promptly remedied. As for doing something nice (yesterday's minor holiday), you missed your chance. Try again next year.
But you still have today, which is National Noodle Day and National German-American Day. Doubled up like that, you're honor-bound to enjoy some schnitzel with noodles. It's also National Mad Hatter Day and National Coaches Day, so find someone who looks like a coach and dump ten gallons of Gatorade on their head. And it's National Child Health Day, though the "national" and the "health" in that phrase cancel each other out.
Tuesday is the big one–National Taco Day! And spare a thought for National Fruit at Work Day. Rounding out the week we celebrate touch tag, fluffernutters, pierogis (Oct 8), parents at lunch, teddy bears at work, ER nurses, and moldy cheese (Oct 9). On the 10th we get cake decorating and angel food cake (redundant, since the frosting is an angel food cake's only virtue), and we honor handbags. Oh, yeah, and it's National Metric System Day. (In America? If only. Also, 10/10? I see what you did there.) On the 11th we celebrate yarn, chess, coming out, and sausage pizza. The 12th is for farmers, gumbo, freethinking, and the clergy.
Should we survive until next Monday, we'll ignore that tyrannical sea captain and honor indigenous Americans. We'll lend our awareness to metastatic breast cancer, and, in a possibly-related action, we'll doff our bras. (Keep them handy, though. Bra Day USA comes up on the 15th).
Selections for the rest of the month include the concept of dessert (Oct 14), hagfish and I Love Lucy (Oct 15), liqueur, the dictionary, and your boss (Oct 16), Black poetry and pasta (Oct 17), and beard removal (Oct 18). Oct 19 is the day to clean your virtual desktop. Then comes National Apple Day (Oct 21), National Color Day (Oct 22), National Mole Day (meaning the unit—Oct 23), Greasy Foods Day (Oct 25), and Chicken Fried Steak Day (Oct 26). The 27th honors black cats. The 28th is National Chocolate Day. The 29th covers oatmeal, hermits, and all cats. On the 30th, happy Candy Corn Day, to those who celebrate. And the 31st, in addition to Halloween, is the festival of breadsticks, magic, and knock-knock jokes.
